Friendship is a Ship that never Sinks

I felt a great shiver in whole my body; I couldn’t hold my tears longer. I was crying in front of a book, which covered by blue flannel. I read it because Jennie really wanted me to read her diary after she had passed away. She left me and Adam forever and never came back. I just thought this was too fast for me, Adam and especially for Jennie.

* * *

I am Rian but just for information I am a girl, a beautiful girl I think. I am a new university student. I had a friend and her name’s Jennie.I and Jennie went to the same university, the same faculty, the same major and the same class. Like a new student in general, we had to follow a series of OSPEK activities. Doing many tasks from seniors until midnight, and the day after we had to wake up very early in the morning. But I understood about it, as a new student we had to start our first day with OSPEK. So, I enter my OSPEK activities with happiness. The first day was the day where we were given information for the OSPEK. That was Sunday, I was wearing a blouse and jeans. I was looking for a building where I should gather at 08.00 a.m. At the time I realized that it was a quarter to eight. I was very panicked and confused, all I did was keep thinking how could I get there at 08.00, but it was impossible. I didn’t even know where the building was. I didn’t even have somebody else to ask for the information. I was thinking again how stupid I was. I didn’t know where the building was and yet I went out late from home. I was still standing in front of the gate with a little hope that I could find somebody who had the same destination. But I thought, it was impossible that there was somebody who was as stupid as me. Ough! How stupid I am! I was wasting time thinking without doing anything. So, with confused feeling I decided to just walk along the great road with hopes that anybody could give me information. It was 07.55. I became more confused. I would feel very embarrassed if I was the only one person who came late. Then suddenly, a man with a motorcycle stopped in front of me. He asked me about building which I didn’t know where, but when he asked about the faculty I felt very happy, I mean at least I wasn’t alone anymore. Wow, what miracle was it? Finally, we found the building together. He asked other people again. Ah, stupid me! Why didn’t I do that? But what’s done is done. At 08.00 we were in front of the building where everybody has been gathering and I got into the building quickly. Oh, I forgot about the man. I tried to look and search around me but it was too difficult because there were so many people. So I decided to just look and listen to people who were talking in front of the microphone.

* * *

Monday, it was the first day when I started my OSPEK until Saturday. Everything was going fine. I also got some friends and one of them was Jennie. The first day I started my lecture I sat beside Jennie. Jennie was a beautiful girl in my opinion. Her body was tall and slim. Her long black hair hung down to the shoulder. Her skin was white and smooth. But something that made her more interesting that she was very smart but friendly. And I very enjoyed being friends with her. Days went by, along with me and Jennie. We knew each other better. We walked to lectures together, did assignments together, spent time for having fun together. If it wasn’t me that came to her house she would came to my house. I felt as if we were twins, so her problem would become my problem too, and it was the same with her. It has been 3 years but it seemed like it was only yesterday.

* * *

“Jennie? Have you woken up? Where are you? Why haven’t you called me?” I grumbled on my mobile phone. It was one of her bad habits which was making someone wait for her without any confirmation.

“All right, all right, wait a minute. I’m sorry… J bye” half an hour later she called me again.

“Hallo? Rian? are you still there? Rian, I’m sorry, I can’t come. I’ve tried hard but I can’t….”

“What?! I’ve been waiting for two hours and you said you couldn’t come?! What’s wrong with you? Ah, forget it!”

“click” I shut my mobile phone.

“Hallo? Rian? Rian? tut… tut…”

This was the first time I was very angry with her. What’s wrong? I was thinking, but why was I worrying about that, I went on my own anyway. Today I waited for her at the park. We had planned that we were going to buy a book together for our thesis material. See? We even did our thesis together. What happened with Jennie? God, I hated guessing like this. I also turned my mobile phone off.

“Rian? Are you with Jennie? Have you met her?” my mom welcomed me by giving many questions, it seemed mom more worried about Jennie than her daughter. It just made me more fed up.

“Oh, what’s wrong with you mom? You seem more worried about her than me?” I grumbled.

“Why do you say that? I just want to know what’s wrong, because Jennie called many times asking about you. I also just want to deliver her message; she said that she’s really sorry.”

“Ah, come on. It’s over, what can we do? I’ll get over it later.” I hoped to my self as I went to my room. I started to read a book which I already bought. Not long after that I slept.

* * *

The day after, I went to my university without Jennie, had my lecture without Jennie, ate without Jennie, spent time without Jennie and went home without Jennie. Maybe it would better if I called her, I thought. But before I did it a message had just arrived.

“Rian, I’m sorry I can’t come today. I’ve always tried hard. But I have to go.” Jennie? That’s all? I felt lonely all day long. She told me so late in the afternoon. She said she would go. No wonder. Maybe she was just too fun with herself. I didn’t reply her message. Maybe she was having fun. Why would I disturb her? One week was over. Jennie still hasn’t called me yet. It was like half of my soul was gone.

* * *

My phone rang. I didn’t know the number. I hoped it was from Jennie. “Hallo?” I said.

“Hallo? Is this Rian?” the caller asked. Hm.. a man, who? Where did he get my number?

“Yes” I said.

“Can we meet? Important, about Jennie. Today at Road Café 10.00 a.m. I’ll be waiting.”

“click.” Who is that? About Jennie? Oh, my God… I’ve got a bad feeling.

I was at the road café. As a stupid person exactly. How can it not be, I didn’t know who will meet me, his name, his face or even his identity. I almost left the café with confuse feeling until somebody touched my shoulder and said

“Rian?” I turned my head and saw his face. I didn’t know but he didn’t look strange to me too. I tried to recognize him by his voice. Maybe he was the one who called me.

“Yes” I said.

“I am Adam, who called you this morning.” Then we sat.

“Sorry for making you confused. I am sorry for taking your time too. But I have to.” He started the conversation.

I took a good look at him. His face was not too white but clean, his hair was neatly cut short. Quite handsome. I only felt like I’ve met him before. But when, where, how I forgot.

“We’ve met before if you remember,” he said. I tried to. “I took you when you first came to your university.”

Took me? Why yes, I remember now. I hadn’t even thanked him.

“Yes, I remember. Thank you. Sorry I just said that now.” I said, embarrassed. Stupid me!

“What can I do for you?” I asked politely.

“Not for me, for Jennie, more like. I’m her brother.” He explained.

“Her brother? She never said anything, I never see you when I go to Jennie’s house.” No wonder he looked familiar, his face was like Jenny’s. I’ve just remembered, I’ve seen his photo at Jennie’s house.

“I go to a school in New York,” he explained. “I just wanted to deliver Jennie’s message to you and ask of you for one thing. Jenny was really sorry. She actually didn’t want to hurt you. She also hoped she could see you. Will you come?”

Wait a sec, I became confused.

“What’s wrong with Jennie? Where is she now?”

He then explained what happened slowly on the way to the hospital.

“Jennie’s the only one I’ve got after mom and dad. I really love her; we’ve always been together since we were children. Wherever she goes I’m always there to protect her and to make sure nothing bad happens to her. She grew to be a beautiful, smart, friendly and cheerful girl. She makes us proud. Until one day, she fell over at school. She passed out. We were really worried. We then brought her to a doctor. The doctor said she’s suffering from leukemia since five years ago.” He stopped for a moment. I didn’t know what to say. It was like a nightmare for me. I pinched my hand. It hurt. “Ever since then we paid more attention to her than before. Then she decided she would spend her time as a useful normal human. And she did. She even told me to study overseas because she knew the best for me. She convinced me that she would be alright. She would be disappointed if I didn’t go. And she was okay. I was even proud of her. She found a friend like you. I want to thank you. You helped her to live. You made her days colourful.”

“I didn’t do anything,” I said with my throat dry. “I don’t even know what really happened. What kind of a friend am I?”

You’re an idiot indeed! I cursed myself.

“It’s okay. I understand. Jennie didn’t want you to worry about her. She’s been very strong. She passed out before she went to see you a week ago. She insisted that she was alright and still planned to go out with you. But mom forced her to the doctor. Mom said if she’s allowed to go then she can go. But the doctor didn’t allow her to go. He even said she should have been in hospital three days before.”

“I... I... Why didn’t she tell the truth?”

“She loves you and didn’t want to make you worry.”

I tried not to cry. Jennie can’t see me cry.

“She wanted to see you before she left..”

Leave. She said that. Leave, leave… Where are you going Jen? Don’t leave me.

I got to the hospital. Then I got off and headed for her room. Along the way, I remembered those wonderful days I had with her. How can I lose her? Her laughter which always entertained me. Her naughtiness that annoyed me. Her words that give me a headache, her wise words that always motivated me not to give up in life. There will be no one to wait for me, no one to listen to me when I have a problem, no one that realizes that I’m not in a good mood. Will I be able to lose her? Don’t take her God! If there is anything I could do so you would not take her, I promise I will do it.

“We’re here,” Adam said. “Smile.”

* * *

“Hi Rian!! I’ve missed you! Are you still mad at me? Please don’t be!” She grinned. Exactly the way she teases me. She can still laugh. “You’re still mad at me, right?” She asked weakly, making me come back to life. I came over to her and pretended to pull a bad face. “Yes, but I missed you too. So I came here to yell at you.” She then smiled as she said, “See, I’m a girl to be longed for.”

I hugged her instantly, I couldn’t stop myself crying but I remembered Adam said to smile and not to make her sadder. God, I really would do anything as long as I don’t have to lose her. She hugged me as she said, “You said you would yell at me. I make you happy, don’t I? So you can’t yell at me.” She laughed. Get real, I can’t do that. I really love you.

“Fine, I won’t. But I have a request you must answer yes or no. You can do that, right?” I asked.

“Oh, that’s easy, what is it?”

“Promise me you won’t leave me and will never go anywhere.” I said miserably. “Why have you never told me Jen? You know I really love you. I don’t want you to leave just like that. I should be the one to say sorry because I was mean to you yesterday. Forgive me, will you?”

Jennie smiled at me. I saw her face very strong, also healthy. I didn’t believe that she would go. The doctors must be lying. Without realizing it, tears fell from my eyes. Jennie said as she wiped my tears, “Rian, look at me. Will I ever leave you? Do I look so mean? I’m not going anywhere Rian. I really love you too. I also believe you’re not going anywhere, right? Rian, if you cry it will make me even sadder. I didn’t tell you because I wanted to live a normal life, that’s all, do you understand Rian? Besides, you’d already know the story from Adam right? I won’t have the heart to tell you Rian.” Her face still looked strong. I had to stop crying.

“Then what can I do for you Jennie? I’ll do anything as long as you stay by my side. How can you forget our plans? We have to go on with it Jen.”

“Stay by my side Rian. We’re going by our plans, as long as you believe I’m not going anywhere.”

That afternoon we talked heaps. Because we hadn’t met for one week, there was a lot I had to tell her. Until I realized her face began to look pale, she was getting weaker in talking. I told her to rest while I went out to get some food. I came back a few minutes later. I decided to accompany her tonight.

“How are you feeling tonight Jennie?” I asked.

“I feel very good.” She then took something out of her drawer. A diary with a blue flannel cover. “I wrote everything here. This is where half of my soul lives. I promised I wouldn’t go anywhere, so take this with you. You can read it tomorrow, because tonight I want to talk to you. Read the last page, okay?” she said as she handed me the book. “Half of your soul is with me, so I won’t feel lonely.” She smiled. I took her book and held her tightly. That night we talked until it was late. I was really afraid of losing her, while talking I held her hand. Until we both fell asleep.

* * *

The next morning, the room became rowdier than before. But they only stood around me. I then woke up. I still held Jennie’s hand, but it has become cold. Ah, maybe she was cold. I blanketed her. I wanted to say something to her, but then I realized that Jenny was asleep forever. I couldn’t get a hold of myself; I cried and tried to wake her up just for one last time. But it was no use, Adam tried to calm me down. Jennie was laid to rest in peace. At home I began to read Jennie’s blue book.

Rian,

Thank you for being a really good friend for me. It means a lot to me. I’ll miss the times when we went out together, had our lectures together, spent time together, had fun together and sharing our problems together. I felt that the rest of my life was really meaningful. I didn’t mean to be selfish leaving you like this, but trust me, if I could pick I would go after you. But I can’t. I can’t, Rian. I hope you can understand. Rian, you are not stupid. I believe you are very smart. How can you be stupid with all those A’s, remember that Rian. Promise me, you’ll never say stupid to yourself anymore. Promise me, okay Rian? Rian, I’ll always be with you. You believe that right? I’ll fight alongside you Rian. You can get anything you want, Rian, so work hard for that. Never give up, Rian. You’ll never be alone Rian, many people love you. Rian, I’ll never forget our friendship. I believe that friendship is a ship that never sinks. I really love you.

Jennie.

* * *

College Assignment in 2006

edited by Aussie